I turned 26 last month, crabby crab moonchild for life! Okay now that I got that out of my system.. If you told me 10 years ago where I’d be right now in my life, I would be a little shocked. No way did I think I was going to have a baby at 25. Live in a house in Riverside with a great dane for a dog. Be married to my high school but not from the same high school sweetheart. Now, this is a very white picket fence type of dream and not for everyone.
Did I mention I’m a Cancer?
But seriously, my core longs for quiet stability and nurturing family. I’ve been unstable and ventured alone. Been there, done that sort of thing. And honestly, in the long run, it wasn’t for me.
If I was on my deathbed today, I would have an endless amount of stories to tell. I’ve had so much fun, I’ve taken chances and opportunities, made irreplaceable memories, experienced childbirth and the wedding of my dreams. My life has been one hell of a ride. However, it’s far from over.
I don’t feel old in age but I feel older in wisdom. Surprisingly, I’ve learned a lot and I surprise older folk with my wisdom. That’s only because I’ve taken everything good and bad that has happened in my life and used them as a learning tool.
I’ve seen the trending posts where people list their age number of things they’ve learned. Let’s admit, those are lengthy. And 26 is A LOT OF THINGS (haha) So instead of listing 26 things I’ve learned, I’m going to give you 6 major lessons I’ve learned in life.
This past month I thought about what stood out to me the most in my life. So in no specific order, here are 6 major lessons I’ve learned in life.
1. Let Go
Let go of what I am. Let go of what I am not. Let go of what I once had. Let go of what I don’t have.
This can be so hard to achieve with social media. It’s inevitable to somewhat compare your life to someone else on Instagram, Facebook, etc. I’m not gonna lie, I’ve done this plenty! And I have to stop and remind myself that I am nothing like this other person. So why compare?
Simply because the internet has made us feel more empowered by likes, comments, and all that jazz. It’s not our fault we’re human, plain and simple. In the ’50s, people compared each other without the internet. They compared their lawns, cars, TVs, blenders and so on. So silly right?
Which why I have to take breaks from social media and social outings from time to time. Being present with myself and my family helps me realize what I have and let go of the rest.
2. Material Things Don’t Really Matter
There’s no deep meaning to this.
I could lose everything but the health and safety of my family is the most important thing to me.
That brings me to my next point.
3. Strong Relationships are Important
Social media makes it easy to stay up to date with new and old friends. But creating and keeping a relationship can be difficult.
Of course, we all get busy. But we go through sh*t and would like that extension of friendship.
When you’ve hit the end of the road, what lives on is your impact on people.
I am not rich nor do I have a lot of fancy things. So my relationships are more valuable than silver or gold.
4. There Is No Such Thing As Plans
You don’t know how many times I have said “this is the plan” and not one thing went according to plan.
Guess what? The plan is to not have a plan.
5. Eat Good, Feel Good
It wasn’t until I moved out of my parent’s house that I learned, food is medicine.
Eventually your body will stop working for you and will start to work against you. Nourishing the body from the inside has long-term effects and much more benefits versus just working out.
I’m still learning the benefits of food and will probably be learning for the rest of my life. Which is fine by me, because I love cooking.
6. Love Yourself
Of course, the biggest lesson of all.
Going beyond, loving my outter appearance, I have been looking at who I am in depth.
Recently, I took a big step into taking care of my mental health. I started seeing a therapist. It’s funny how that is so scary for people. It’s scary to admit or talk about because often times it’s associated with having a mental health dissorder. That’s not always the case. I’m here to tell you, that if there are things you can’t tell anyone but carry them as a burden. Talk to a professional.
It takes guts to seek professional help. It takes even more guts to tell a complete stranger everything about yourself, especially things no one else knows.
My favorite thing I have learned so far from therapy, is being in the NOW. I dwell on the past and get anxious for the future. My therapist taught me that I can’t change what has happened and I can’t control what will happen. Everytime I leave a session, I feel a little bit lighter and look forward to the next one.
To me, that is real self-love and self-care.
“Don’t just count your years, make your years count.” George Meredith
Check out my other blog posts on self-care & self-love: